Two weekends ago, Bella started peeing in the house. I found out when I stepped in it. I was not happy. I forgot that LOVE begets LOVE.
The peeing had started on Friday. Friday I had taken her to the groomers for the first time. When I picked her up, I was told that she had been really nervous during the grooming. We got home and that day was full of clients. I brought her home and we fell into our normal routine. On Saturday I had a work engagement in Oak Island. I left her with a sitter for 6 hours. That was the longest I had left her with someone up to this point. When I came back was when I stepped in the pee the first time. Sunday night I caught her peeing inside. She had her harness on, we were about to go out, I stopped for a quick moment to do something and I caught her doing it. I got angry. I yelled. She cowered. I felt awful.
I had read multiple articles about it and they all said the same thing. Don’t yell. Take them immediately outside to see if they finish. Clean it up and start using positive reinforcement.
I had done the exact opposite.
That night as I was laying in bed, wide awake from guilt. I had a conversation with Spirit, offered all my angst over to be cleared and said prayers. I asked Spirit for some clarity. Right away, old memories began to fill my mind.
I flashed back to childhood. I had been a bed-wetter. My dad would get angry and yell. I would cower. I remember my parents trying to limit my liquid intake after dinner. That didn’t work. They then thought it might be a UTI. Nope. I was an energetically sensitive and stressed child. I just wanted to know that I was loved.
In that moment, I knew that Bella was feeling the same.
In that moment it was clear that taking her to the groomers for the first time and leaving her for 6 hours the very next day were two jarring events in her young life. She’s very energetically sensitive. She was feeling stressed and needing to know that she was loved. I also had the thought that she is a very verbal dog. She groans when I pet her, grumbles to get my attention, and at the end of each yawn, squeaks. So, her LOVE language is words of affirmation. LOL. I know that that may sound ridiculous, but I kid you not, she gets perky when I give her verbal praise.
I realized that shifting from anger into redirection and praise was what she needed.
The next morning, I restarted the training process of giving her treats each time she peed and pooped outside. I began giving her more verbal praise. I became more active in giving her verbal praise and making sure to connect with her throughout the day. No matter how busy I was. I focused on letting her know that this was her home and I was so happy she was part of it.
I realized that this experience is allowing me to heal that little girl in me that is super sensitive and just wants to be loved. It also was able to have compassion for my father because he often worked overtime and was tired a lot during my childhood. So, I had a healing around that as well.
When I can recognize my angry reactions, offer them over to Spirit, pray for clarity and listen, I am shown exactly what I can do to heal it. And often there is a bonus of being able to heal an older wound.
Bella stopped peeing in the house as soon as I expanded into love.
LOVE begets LOVE.
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