It all started with the bunny ears.
Picture this…you are a little kid and you want to learn to tie your own shoes. They show you how to make bunny ears to tie your shoes. From then on, you push your parents hands away and yell, “I do it!” anytime your shoes need to be tied. You want to do it all by yourself because when you do, the adults around you will clap and tell you how proud they are of you. You are growing to like that feeling.
From a very young age we’re encouraged to figure things out on our own. To prove that we can do it ourselves. We are rewarded and recognized for that. We’re encouraged to be unique and different. We are encouraged to stand out, to stand alone.
As life continues to unfold, we win some battles and lose others. We learn what's right and what's wrong. We feel alone and lonely. We don't understand why. We've done everything right. What if I were to tell you that we’ve done it backwards?
Doing it on our own is creating our misery. It’s about letting go of control and asking God/Spirit/The Universe to guide us. When I first heard this concept, I thought, “WTF!? What about the accolades? And everything that I have done to make myself special? You mean…I’m supposed to let go of control and surrender my life to God?”
Yep.
The need for approval was how I lived my life. “Doing it on my own” was the way to go. It was important to be recognized and rewarded for my efforts. I like to win! But why do I feel miserable and lonely?
When I quiet my mind, a gentle voice assures me that I can learn to flourish in a more supportive way. A way that will help others and impact the world in a positive way. It tells me that everyone is learning in their own way and not to judge them. It shows me that it is not up to me to convince others that my way is the only way and the right way. They will figure it out when they figure it out. My only job is to love myself and to love them.
“But accolades are important!”, another voice shouts. “Other people do it all wrong and can’t be trusted!” that voice says. That voice is terrified to believe that love is the answer. It continues to chatter, “I need to establish my uniqueness. I need to be right!” Then a third voice pops in…” Do I? Maybe there is a better way.”
The distrustful voice is terrified to allow the love of God/Spirit in because it did not create it. And it likes to claim responsibility for everything that’s created. It needs to establish uniqueness and separateness. And this world provides many opportunities for that. That voice resists surrendering to the belief that I’m part of something bigger and becomes like that toddler screaming to be allowed to figure things out on its own.
When I let that voice lead my life, I walk away from God/Spirit and separates myself from the love that I come from, the love that I already am. In doing that I become miserable. So, in reality, I’m afraid to let go of the misery I have created because gosh darn it, I created it!
And it all started with the bunny ears!
This my friend’s is the conundrum of being a human on a Spiritual path. And it happens every day. When we can establish practices that help us connect to that gentler voice we flourish in our life. When we forget and connect more to the other voice we flounder. But don’t worry about listening to the screeching voice and trying to be perfect. It is through the back and forth between the two voices that we learn the lessons that we are meant to learn.
If you would like some support moving through a current conundrum and the other voice is drowning out the gentler voice within you, book a session with me. I’ll hold a safe space so that you can move through it and here your gentle intuitive voice again. I know it’s not easy to believe that that’s possible or even ask for help sometimes. I promise you, if you work with me, you can do it! Click here to book a session today: https://www.readingswithlorri.com/sessions
